Why we run......

Biologically, evolutionary, spiritually, physiologically......there's an argument for each as to why people run.

In the western world, some run to maintain a semblance of activity in an otherwise sedentary lifestyle.  

Other continents and countries still see running as the primary mode of transport either because the infrastructure does not support vehicles OR the price of vehicles is prohibitive.

There are others who choose running as a form of spirituality...a path to enlightenment.  The most well documented of which are the Marathon Monks of Mount Hiei in Japan, who run distances of 52miles a day for 100 consecutive days.

There are those who run because they have to in order to survive....persistence hunters of the African plains, Australian bush and the few remaining true wildernesses on the planet. 

And there are those that run in order to compete, to be the best at one of the oldest of athletic measures that pre-dates Christ.  The 'Athletes'.

Finally, in my opinion, there are those that run 'just because they can' and for fun.  Amongst this group, the majority are (but not exclusively) below the age of 12 years old......

But amongst this hotch potch of categories there is a another group.  Those that run not towards but away from something.

For this group, fear is the motivation.  Fear of becoming trapped, of sliding into a place they don't want to be, of memories that they want to leave behind.  Its not something pulling them forward, its something pushing them further, harder and longer.

I run because I'm scared.  I'm scared of becoming what I once was and of losing the freedom that running has given me.....from constraints that couldn't be broken by a single act or being.

I don't care about times for specific distances, I don't care whether I place 1st or last in any events I may enter. 

I just care that I can run. Alone. With my thoughts. With my fears....compartmentalizing them and keeping them in check.  Making them manageable so that they are conquered by me, not conquering of me.

An old native American saying is 'Never judge a man until you have walked a mile in his moccasins'.  But the truth is, never judge a man until you have walked the same path in the same shoes....because all journeys have a start point and no two paths are the same!

Therefore, in order to understand what drives a person, we need to know where they started, where they have walked and where they want to go....their direction and speed are not true indicators of what lies behind the visible indicators.

Jump......or fall.....your choice!

'When you reach the edge, you either fly or come crashing down with a bump......but you'll never fly if you don't take that jump!'

The surge of adrenaline, the thumping beat of your heart in your chest as if it is about to burst free from your rib cage, the cold sweat, the fumbling on the keyboard...........hit [ENTER].........done, no turning back, thats it committed now!

I've faced a few tricky situations in my relatively short life time, some I would rather have not been in and others that I relished.........but all that have defined who I am.  But nothing compares to the feeling of being so close, and yet so far (257miles on foot to be precise) away from what was only a dream 2 years ago.

In October 2011 I jumped.  I said something out loud to which my wife said 'Do it'. So I did.....I pressed [ENTER] not just once, but 3 times.........and set the wheels in motion for 2012 to be a life changer!

And then, for some unexplained reason, I did it again in October 2012......I hit [ENTER] 4 times......

And what did I learn.........that pressing [ENTER] more times is a jump.......a leap of faith in myself (and whether my wife and daughters have enough patience).....to test myself and go where I never thought I could go.

With 2013 coming to a close, I've hit [ENTER] a few more times........in fact more than enough to earn the 7 points needed to qualify for the 2015 Ultra Trail Mont Blanc............the dream!

All things in life worth having need to be qualified for.....you earn them by going further and pushing yourself harder.  The more you do, the more you get.

All the time, you have to keep asking yourself  'Is the promise worth the price?' because if it isn't, when it comes time to pay, you'll be lacking.

When we start out in life, we don't know how to walk, talk or even feed ourselves.......yet as adults we expect to be able to make massive changes and have things tomorrow that we haven't earned.  We haven't paid the price for them......we didn't qualify!

So here I am, 12 months away from qualifying for the right to attempt to fulfil a dream........that's right, I have to qualify just to attempt my dream....no guarantees!

Is the promise worth the price?  Damn right it is!  In one way, I'm half the man I was when I started out.......in other ways I have grown bigger.

But above all else, this is no longer my personal journey.  There are others sharing this path....some occasionally, some frequently and 3 people every single second of every single day of every single week of every single month.  My wife and 2 daughters.

Is the promise worth the price?  It has to be.  Otherwise the price paid so far is a debt that cannot be repaid!

It doesn't matter how fast you go, as long as you have forward momentum, you'll get to your destination at some point!